MEDITATION

I did read some of that book that she gave me last visit. I tried one of the meditation exercises. I thought that it wouldn’t affect me. My super intellect…right? Don’t try to get in my head…the walls are high with battlements and crenulations…plus you wouldn’t like what you’d find. I read it first before trying. It wasn’t hard to remember. You started with your toes and feet and worked your way up your body as you focused on releasing stress and tension. I was truly skeptical. I then read the sun meditation exercise, where you are walking on an imaginary sandy beach. You go through the same imagery basically as the muscle relaxation technique except that you start up top and work your way down. And instead of merely releasing tension and stress you are focusing warm rays of sunshine massaging each body part as the tension melts away. After reading it I decided to give it a try. I was at work and couldn’t be totally at peace. I also had my door open so someone might walk by and think I was trying to sleep, which is what happened once, but hey I’m the boss. It was just a short interruption though. I started with the muscle relaxation and slowly worked my way upward. My feet had a lot of tension. I could feel them even as I worked my way to the thighs. At some point my feet were relaxed and my mind didn’t focus there any longer. As I moved up focusing on each part the body parts a few steps back were no longer there in the same way any longer. They were deadened in a way. I completed it all with only a little trouble. The neck and shoulders were a bitch. I then delved right into the sun exercise. When I was all done and opened my eyes I was super calm. I was in a daze, feeling a bit disoriented. It was pretty cool. I got a lot out of it, but we are talking probably 20 mins or so with my eyes closed. I put this book on my Amazon wish list so when I get the urge I can purchase it.

This visit she gave me a stress relief CD that she wants me to give a few listens to over the next couple of weeks. I burned them so I can have them. I figured that people that used mediation and yoga and Buddhism philosophy and shit like that did get something out of it. The mind is a powerful thing. I just didn’t think I was able to follow it. Strong mind you see. Actually it seems that it takes a strong mind to accomplish this inner peace that they feel. I still see myself with much bravado and machismo so it is hard to let go. I bet no one found enlightenment without working towards it. Hopefully I can be one of those legs crossed happy nerds.